What's my deal?
Sometimes I wonder if the mess "out there" isn't really "in here." I'm not schizophrenic or anything like that, but sometimes I do things that just don't make any sense. I'm smart, but I act dumb.
For some reason that's beyond reasonability, I've been using this blog as a venting place. Apparently I didn't learn my lesson in January. Hopefully it's sunk in this time before any major damage is done.
I need a break from myself, because I don't like who I've become. I've always been cynical, but the bitterness is new. I apologise for putting the dark side of myself out in public for everyone to see. I don't fully understand why I feel compelled to write so much stuff down at a time when my thoughts and feelings aren't worth repeating. I don't know why. Like I said, I'm smart, but I sometimes don't act like it.
I allow comments on this site. Right now my personal judgment is not a trustworthy editor. If I post something stupid, hurtful, easily misinterpreted, or otherwise inappropriate, leave a comment saying so. It's highly likely that whatever I said just wasn't as well thought out as it needed to be.
I'm going to try to back off of this blogging thing a bit. That whole "if you can't say something nice" thing is a good idea. Wish I'd have remembered it earlier.
Jason
posted by Jason Fry @ 9:10 PM
3 comments
3 Comments:
Jason,
I am sorry to hear the news on the
Sweetwater job. I feel for ya.
With blogging, as in life, it is good
to sleep on thoughts and feelings. It
seems the next day, though I am still
disappointed, I at least can see
better on what to say or not say. Maybe
you should just give this a try on blogging. Perhaps it takes two nights sleep to get it but give it time.
I have found that what I thought was
not really what I thought..nor necessarily
correct either. :)
And do not worry...let the Lord handle it.
Easier said than done but easier for the
Lord than us.
Do not be so hard on yourself Jason...you
have to remember you are still a young
man and the Lord is shaping and molding you. When I was 27 I felt I should
be much wiser by that age but I look back now and see I had 15 more years to
be shaped and molded and I still feel like
a kid today ... which I am in the Lord's eye.
You have no deal. Just give it over
to the Lord and let him handle it. I am
always amazed how long I hold onto something before I remember to give it
to the Lord.
IJG,
Terry
Jason,
I know we never really got the chance to bond since I was already at OC when y'all came to Texarkana, but my dad sent me your blog a while back and I've been checking once in a while since then.
Without going into it, I'll just say that I've felt your pain and understand some of what you've been through. Blogging through hurt is a tough game, because you want to experess your true emotions while at the same time remembering your audience. Fine line to balance. I hope you won't beat yourself up over whatever you said.
I can't imagine how you feel right now, but I see that you have faith to carry you through the uncertainties. I'm sure everything will work out for the best for you and your sweet family, and I can't wait to see the ways in which God lays out His direction for y'all.
Don't give up on the blog. Many who care about you want to know how you're doing-- really doing-- and want to keep up with the Frys.
God bless-
aw
Ann,
It means alot for you to be thinking of me and my family while in the middle of your own difficult time.
You've described the blogging dilemma very well. I wouldn't write anything if it wasn't true to me emotions, but putting those emotions in print can be dangerous, or at least difficult to manage for a public audience.
I don't plan on giving up blogging, but I am going to work on being more aware of the fine line.
Jason
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